Trying to Move Forward

Last week I made a call and said I want to help. I want to empower more minorities; I want to make things more diverse. Let’s talk. And so we are. The next day I wrote an op-ed. I pitched it to a paper. I said this is how I feel, and I need to tell the truth.

During the days that came after, I found a cause and backed it fully. I put my support behind those who have none. And I subscribed to things that come in print because words matter, facts matter, and so does the First Amendment.

I spent the weekend texting and listening and reading and hoping. I tried to sit with everything in the middle of the struggle. I told my white friends in blue states what it looks like, feels like, sounds like living in a deep, deep red one.

I started moving forward with intention. And I bought some really good ice cream.

Tuesday hurt. It hurt in a way that made me feel so much like “the other” I didn’t really want to go outside. But I know that the more we talk, and love, and act the more we help. The more we SEE each other the less we fear. So acknowledge the pain you’re seeing. It’s real. Don’t be afraid to look. There are lessons our country is learning. Please show up. There are those who have more privilege than others. Do you understand what that really means? Now is your chance.

There are tender hearts bleeding everywhere. Hold space for them. Hold space for me. And if you are thrilled or relieved or incredibly apathetic, you get to have those feelings too. That’s not my job. My job is to show up and put it on the page. I write my story because it’s ours.

We’re not alone in this. We never were. Sure, “love wins.” I believe it. But I think it’s okay not to know what that looks like right now. This is hard. The good stuff always is. Let’s not turn our heads just yet. There’s a nation that’s divided; it is our job to deal with what that means. We had an election, and now results. We know more than we did yesterday. Reality is helpful when we’re looking to change a few things.

I leave you with this…. A certain Puerto Rican once said, “Love is love is love.” And that hasn’t changed.

I promise to fight for that love every damn time.


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